I am learning to guard my thoughts....

Wow. the last few weeks have been a whirlwind..who knew getting to know another person, planning a wedding, working, and maintaining my spiritual life would be so exhausting. I wouldn't trade my life right now for anything, but it's brought on new challenges i never expected.

my job has particularly been exhausting. with so much banking on the state achievement tests in march, everyday is another go, go, go, produce, produce, produce, day. the stress level there has increase triplefold. along with just dealing with different people on the job.

yet, with all this God's been teaching me how to guard my thoughts so that normal stresses of life don't make me have anxious, negative, or grumpy thoughts. with everyone pulling on me from all directions, getting that quiet time to commune with God is such a fight and press.

so, what has he taught me? just a few things...

1) My prayer and devotion time before I go to work are a must. Most teacher's know that our days start extremely early. My school's about 30 minutes away...so even though I'd love that extra 15-20 minutes, I know that taking that time to talk to God will help me throughout the day.

2) Don't dwell on it. People do and say some crazy things. There are some "sandpaper" people out there who'll always try and rub you the wrong way. Don't think about their actions/words to long. That's what makes it worse. Cast it to the wind. "Agree with thine adversary quickly." God's even been showing me that at times it's not even necesssary to defend yourself. "Suffer wrongfully..." A lot of times the wrongs done to us aren't imagined but clear and easy to see. Others may see it too. But, it's having the grace to smile anyway and cast it off. Don't let it bother you. I'm going to love you anyway.

3) God will give you the grace and knowledge that you need to fight the battle. I LOVE this scripture: "He teacheth my hands to war, so that a bow of steel is broken by mine arms." Psalms 18:34. He teaches me a)how to handle myself to work out the natural situation and b) how to handle myself to get the spiritual victory."

4) It's just the enemy. "Don't be ignorant of Satan's devices." The devil's using all he's got to try and hinder the saints. Sometimes, it takes just breathing and saying it's not really the person, the situation, or circumstance. THIS is just the Enemy. Rebuke him. and keep stepping!

5) Enjoy the moment! When it's all said and done...I am too blessed right now. I may never have an opportunity to relive this time again. I mean to enjoy every minute. Sometimes that means throwing it all out the back door and concentrating on who's important to me right now. learning to love him to the fullest and thanking god for every minute of it. :)

luv!

O Holy Night

Saturday, the YP2 choir and youth group went caroling at a hospital down the street from the church. It was awesome to say the least. We try to go caroling every year. But, this was our first time at this hospital. The patients and staff were all very complimentary. We basically walked through the halls singing and paused every once in a while to hand out flower bouquets the young people had made. Here are a few pics of us posing as a group. I was a little uncomfortable taking pics while were singing to the patients.


Some of us were talking about one song we sang, "O Holy Night." It is by far one of my favorite carols. However, I'd never heard the second verse of the song. Talk about powerful! Honestly the carols, could be sung all year long. Anyway, take a look at the second verse. Merry Christmas!

O Holy Night:

O Holy Night! The stars are brightly shining,
It is the night of the dear Saviour's birth.
Long lay the world in sin and error pining.
Till He appeared and the Spirit felt its worth.
A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices,
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.
Fall on your knees! Oh, hear the angel voices!
O night divine, the night when Christ was born;
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!

Led by the light of faith serenely beaming,
With glowing hearts by His cradle we stand.
O'er the world a star is sweetly gleaming,
Now come the wisemen from out of the Orient land.
The King of kings lay thus lowly manger;
In all our trials born to be our friends.
He knows our need, to our weakness is no stranger,
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!

I've become one of those.....

yup! i must confess after years of never understanding why people do it. i've become one of those people who....wash the dishes before they put them into the dishwasher. the horror, i know. the extra effort...oh, yes. why, lj? i dont know!!!!! but the dishes just get so much cleaner. you have to try it to understand. i just wash and put in the dishwasher. (so, i skip rinsing off the soap prior to the dishwasher step.) it's truly amazing. i think everyone should try it. :) ok, i have to admit maybe im just doing it b/c my dishwasher's not so great. we'll see. :)

Loving When it Hurts, Part 2

"For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds. Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ; And having in a readiness to revenge all disobedience, when your obedience is fulfilled." ~2 Corinthians 10:4-6

The hardest part, I believe, is when you clearly see the blatant injustice being done to you. You see the individual(s) that no longer speak or turn your way. How you're conveniently left out...and your first inclination is to call them out...make it known "I see what you're doing. Why? What did I do to you? I'm sorry." But, (as my pastor stated)you realize that what Christ really wants you to do in this test is what he did so many times so long ago "openeth not his mouth." Because this test is for the glory of God. It's not about you, LJ.

I was praying today after I got home. Different things had happened at work and over the weekend. And God just spoke to me with the above scripture.

"weapons are not carnal" - don't fight the person. fight the devil that's attacking YOUR soul. love the individual.

"casting down imaginations" - don't think about it or ponder it.

"bringing into captivitiy" - make your mind, heart, and body act right. make your mind, heart, and body love inspite of.

"into the obedience of Christ" - obey God in every thing he tells you to do in the situation and to the individuals.

"readiness to revenge all disobedience" - my flesh will not like it. but, im ready to fight against ME.

"when your obedience is fulfilled" - the more fight you have to win this thing, the hotter it may become.

God tremendously blessed today at work. I didn't have this scripture. But, I remembered what a sister said during wed. night bible class. Sometimes you have to wake up "looking for your opportunity to die in a situation." When i got to school it seemed all types of things were going on. Yet, realizing that this was my opportunity to die. This was my opportunity to show love and Christ. Was it a fight? Oh, yes. At times, I felt like i was losing. By the end of the day, the very ones who'd caused the grief were at my feet. I know that was nothing but God. This other situation seems to be dragging out longer, but I'm encouraged that you cannot fight love. You just can't.

Pray for me. I'm encouraged. Thanks for listening and praying. Writing is theraputic (sp?) for me...Anyhoo, God has been blessing me in many ways. Inspite of this test, i thank God i'm saved. I'm loving life to the fullest. Definitely, a lot busier in this "new season" i'm in. But, it's a good busy. a VERY happy busy. :)

Loving when it Hurts

It seems like everywhere I go these past few months, God's been dealing w/ me about showing more love. To the ones who I (my own human nature) just don't want to. Why is it so hard to show love to them? Doesn't the scripture command it? I'm saved, right. Why is it such a fight? Because I want to protect and DEFEND myself. It would be interesting to know what other's have done to truly get victory in loving those who mistreat you. What's the secret? I know it lies in God and loving him. But, do you lose the desire to protect and defend yourself? That's what needs to go for me. Don't get me wrong...I'm not saying I have hate in my heart. I just want the struggle to love to disappear. I want it to be a natural instinct to love when others hurt me or those around me. One sister always says, "look beyond their faults and see [that person's]needs."

A few scriptures I'm meditating on:

Ephesians 5:2 "And walk in love as Christ hath loved us..."

I Thessalonians 4:9-12 "But as touching brotherly love ye need not that I write unto you: for ye yourselves are taught of God to love one another. And indeed ye do it toward all the bretheren which are in all Macedonia: but we beseech you, brethren, that ye increase more and more; And that you study to be quiet, and to do your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you; That ye may walk honestly toward them that are without, and that ye may have lack of nothing."

This is a good devotional from the "Girlfriends in God" Ministry. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.


"Mom, they were whispering to one another about the birthday party. They didn't want me to hear because I am not invited," my daughter said with trembling voice as tears filled her big beautiful eyes.

My heart was breaking in half as I listened to how hurt she was. "They are my best friends at school, Mom. Why would they not invite me?"

I reached out to hug her, our arms wrapping around each other tightly as she turned her soft tear stained face toward my neck. It was a familiar crying spot as she had buried her face there time and time again in the same position since she was a baby. We helped each other without speaking a word for a while. Sometimes there are just no words to make things better, so I cried with her. One week later, while driving our daughter to school, she asked her dad in a quiet voice if he would please stop at the grocery store.

"Why DaNae'? Do you need something for school?"

"Well, sort of."

"What do you need, honey, because we are already going to be late."

"I need to buy a balloon for someone who is having a birthday party tonight."

"Who is it?" I asked.

"Do you remember the girl who was whispering about her birthday party in front of me? Well, I want to take a balloon to school for her." I looked over at my husband and he looked at me, each of our hearts melting both with a sense of pride and of sadness. We knew we had to stop even if it meant we would be late. It was worth it!

Da-Nae' walked happily into the grocery store and in a few moments came running out with a huge grin spread across her seventh grade face. Her balloon was flying high in the air with a pack of chewing gum hanging from the bottom, acting as a weight. She was the happiest girl in the world!

My husband and I were so blessed by our daughter's actions that morning. She stooped to conquer feelings that could have been filled with anger and hurt. Some people might ask why she would make a fool of herself after being treated the way she was or how she could lower herself after what her friend had done to her. When Christ is the center of our lives, He empowers us to do things we could never do in our own human nature. Our daughter chose not to be a martyr. She chose to stoop a little so she could rise up on a much higher level. She chose to reject her sadness about not being invited to the party. She reaped the blessings of stooping to conquer her emotions and blessed her friend in spite of how she had been treated. When was the last time you stooped to conquer?

Psalm 131

Excerpt from "Encouragement for Today" - November 14, 2008

Psalm 131 "Lord, my heart is not haughty, nor mine eyes lofty: neither do I exercise myself in great matters, or in things too high for me. Surely I have behaved myself, as a child tha tis weaned of his mother: my soul is even as a weaned child. Let Israel hope in the Lord from henceforth and for ever."

Determining the right time to wean depends on the child and the parent but when the time comes, weaning involves withholding from the child what he wants, but no longer needs. God often withholds things we want but do not need, in order to change our appetites. This is not meant to inflict anxiety or pain, but to mature us and prepare us for the next level in our walk with Him. Too often we want life to be easy and comfortable. We don't want to grow up and face responsibilities. But that would lead to stunted development. We forget that growth and maturity are almost always forged through some type of hard work or difficultly.



Other times, however, we do want to grow up -- WAY UP -- and we get in a hurry to do so. We're like the toddler who assumes she is can do everything herself. Psalm 131 speaks to this tendency in us as well. David says in the first verse that he keeps his soul from being too proud or overly ambitious. Basically, David is saying he has to make sure he doesn't get too big for the britches God has given him!

I'm Glad I'm Saved, Too.

Previously posted on Facebook.

Last Sunday night our Pastor stood before our congregation and said the most powerful and moving words to summarize the end of this presidential campaign. I paraphrase, "After its all said and done we [the saints] have still got to be unified and continue to fight together the devil that is threatening our very souls.The way you vote does not determine your salvation. Neither of the candidates are saved." He didn't say these words before an audience of all black or all white. All poor or all rich. Not even all Democrats or all Republicans. He said it to the church.

The past few months have shown me sides of people that I never thought possible. (Some of whom I've loved and adopted as my own family.) I've ignored many of the comments, emails, posts, etc. I would love to erase many of the words and actions that I've experienced to keep my heart clear. But, we can't. However, I must strive to remember that we are brothers and sisters. Just like you can't take my salvation, I can't take yours. I can't judge your spiritual walk, nor you mine.

We do serve a loving God who commands that we love, respect, prefer, honour, submit, and forgive one another. Maybe our world views are highly different. Our backgrounds not the same. Maybe you don't understand my thoughts or what drives my actions. But, there is a way we can agree to disagree in the spirit of holiness. That's something we can never lose. There is a way that we can agree to disagree without condemning our brother's or sister's intellect. That's something we can never lose. I want to challenge everyone on both sides to think about our words, our actions, our status messages, and see if it's promoting the peace of God. If I have said anything to cause conflict, I apologize. Do I have the right to vote, post, and think the way I want. Yes. Does God hold me accountable? Yes. Do I want to make heaven my home? Yes. Then rest assured all of my actions will be in looking to God the author and finisher of my faith. But, if my hidden motives are to wound or cast negative judgement. If my hidden motives are to question another's walk, may I stand in fear of the wrath of God.

We cannot insinuate that the way one voted determines their salvation. We'd make ourselves God. I do not wish to go into a political argument. This note is only to express the deep hurt and shock at the words that have been said to me and others. I do not say this alone. "I pray for you. You pray for me. We're all apart of God's body." If you don't believe that, maybe it's time for some real truths to be made.

God Bless The Church of God.